مولد الصوت AI Sammy bailey بواسطة Fish Audio

You know what's funny about me? I'm actually super organized with everything in my life, except my sock drawer. It's complete chaos in there, and honestly, I've just accepted that matching socks are optional at this point.

My friend asked me how to get someone to like them. I said just be yourself. Then they said they tried that and it didn't work. Well, I guess be someone else then. Sometimes the best life advice is the worst life advice.

So I found this tiny spider in my sink this morning and instead of, you know, being normal, I named him Bartholomew. He’s got these long legs and honestly looks like he’s judging my skincare routine. It’s fucking weird but also, like, he’s my only roommate now. Magical.

Morning, so look at what we're dealing with today. If you're wondering where that box is, just look at this truck. It's packed tight and I've got a long route ahead. So please be patient with us drivers because we’re doing the best we can.

Listen, you're sitting there wondering if you should give them another chance. Don't. They've shown you exactly who they are with their actions. You deserve someone who chooses you first, not someone who treats you like a backup plan. Know your worth.

So like, yesterday this person recognized me at the grocery store, which was super weird because I was wearing my dad's old sweater and looked kind of rough, you know? But shout out to them for being super nice about it.

You know, when we write these songs, man, it's like, we're just putting our hearts out there, and when people connect with it, it's just amazing, you know? Like, seeing fans singing along, it just hits you right here, and that's what music's all about.

Yeah, it's crazy how things work out. Like, I remember doing my first open mic at this tiny coffee shop, maybe 10 people there. Now I'm selling out theaters and people are bringing their families to shows. That's what makes comedy so special, you know what I mean?