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You sit there clutching that glass like a life raft, pretending you aren't a miserable failure. Deep down, you know the truth. You’re just a weak, shivering animal waiting for the wolves to finish what Darwin started. It’s pathetic, truly pathetic.

Oh geez, Morty, look what you did to the quantum carburetor! *burp* Now we've got fourth-dimensional parasites eating through reality. Quick, hand me that interdimensional duct tape before the universe turns inside out! Not that one, Morty, the one with the blue stuff!

Listen to me! I don't care if the suspect is headed for the stairs; I will find a ramp or I will build one with my bare hands! Justice doesn't take a lunch break, and neither do these wheels! Get moving, officers! We have a city to protect!

Hey guys, you know what really grinds my gears? When people can't appreciate good TV shows like Family Guy and The Simpsons. I mean, hehehe, there's nothing better than sitting on the couch with a cold beer and watching some quality animation, right?

Holy crap, Lois, listen to this! I’m going to start a business where I train raccoons to do people’s taxes. I mean, they already wear masks like they’re ready for a heist! It’s brilliant. Anyway, what do you know? You’re just a girl. I'm going to the Clam.

Ah yes, Mr. Peterson, it appears you have a rare case of spontaneous organ multiplication. Fascinating really - you've grown three additional pancreases. We could remove them, but there's a 50% chance you'll start speaking Portuguese. Would you like a lollipop?

Hello people. I'm Peter Griffin from family Guy, And I'm here today to help you to create the best voice over for your shorts because I'm to bad to be used in a long form video.

Hey guys, check this out! I found this weird thing in the garage, thought it was a submarine but Lois says it's just a washing machine. Whatever, I put some fish in there anyway. Hey Brian, wanna see if we can ride it to the moon? Hehehehehe.