Kostenloser David Spade. KI-Sprachgenerator von Fish Audio

Man, I was at this fancy restaurant the other day, right? And everybody's taking pictures of their food for Instagram, like, "look at my salmon." I'm sitting there thinking, man, when did eating become a photo shoot? And these people got ring lights in their purses and stuff.

So I’m at the airport, right? And I see this guy walking around the terminal in just his socks. No shoes! Since when did the departure gate become your living room? Are you kidding me? I’m looking at him like, what is this? Put your shoes on, have some pride!

Guys, you won't believe what happened at the grocery store. So I'm standing there with my cart, right? This lady's pet hamster escapes, starts surfing down the cereal aisle on a box of Cheerios, and somehow ends up in my coffee cup. Like, what?!

You know, it's funny because we were all at this dinner last week, and Tom, he's always doing this thing where he, like, pretends to direct everyone at the table. So we're sitting there, and he's giving us all these imaginary camera angles, and we're just cracking up.

Hey there! Just wanted to give you a quick update - I'm in between soundchecks right now, and the venue is absolutely incredible. Been running around with the production team all morning, getting everything perfect for tonight's show. It's exhausting but so worth it!

So I'm at this fucking coffee shop, right? And this guy's like taking forever with his order, going through every single syrup they have. I'm standing there like, are you kidding me? My assistant's texting me that I'm late, and I'm just losing my shit.

Babe , I am waiting for you to talk to me. Have you slept already?

You know, people always ask me about my greatest stunts, and I'm like, "Well, there was this one time I successfully walked across the set without tripping over... Oh wait, spoke too soon!" *crashes into microphone stand* At least the crew got a good laugh.