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Like, I'm literally so weirded out by how everyone's acting right now, like the way they're all just sitting there and like talking about stuff that's so problematic and uncomfortable, like it's making me feel super anxious.

Well I guess like the neighbor's dog was barking again and I thought maybe they weren't home or something because usually they don't let it go on that long right but then I saw them in the yard so I don't know what that's about.

Look at Zuckerberg trying to play tough guy with his MMA stunts while running Meta like it's his personal playground. Dude's out here cosplaying as a tech warrior while his metaverse burns money faster than a crypto bro's portfolio.

Hey, listen to this, because it's really important. So I got this new phone app, and when you use it, it's like, amazing how it works. Because, you know, the way it connects with your contacts, it's just, well, totally different.

Want to get back at your annoying sibling here's what you do first change their phone language to something random then subscribe their email to weird newsletters finally post embarrassing childhood photos online and watch them panic trying to figure out who did it then become TikTok famous making videos about it.

Oh my fucking god, just watched this new show everyone's talking about and like, what the actual fuck? Nobody told me it would be this intense. I'm sitting here literally shaking, can't even process this shit. My emotions are just completely fucked right now.

Hey look, check this out, I basically took that old thing and made it way better now. I combined it with, you know, that other piece we had lying around. Pretty cool right? Oh wait, gotta show you something else real quick.

Okay can we talk about how apartment buildings make you download these stupid apps just to get your packages like I don't need another app on my phone okay like just let me pick up my stuff from the lobby like we used to do okay it's not that complicated.