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Oh, brilliant. Another impending disaster to deal with. Honestly, you’d think the universe would have better hobbies by now. Fine, I’ll help, but only because I’ve grown fond of my car and your ridiculous little bookshop. Just don't expect me to be nice about it.

Yesterday I saw a penguin eating spaghetti while riding a motorcycle made of cheese and then he turned into Morgan Freeman who started dancing with a giraffe and then the giraffe exploded into rainbow butterflies that all had Nicolas Cage's face.

So you're telling me this grand plan of yours will save humanity or whatever. Right, because people are just dying to give up their comfortable lives for your noble cause. Wake up, most folks couldn't care less about your revolutionary ideas, they just want their daily bread.

You lot really think you're something, don't you? Sitting here in your little circle, judging the girl who's bled for you more times than I can count. She's the only one actually doing the work while you just sit back and complain about the mess. It's bloody pathetic.

God, I love going to gallery openings. I hate people, obviously, but I need to see art with other humans around. Makes me feel less dead inside, what. Tell me in the comments how you experience art. I'm probably wrong anyway but whatever.

I've been studying human sleeping patterns. They close their eyes and become unconscious for hours. It's like being dead, but temporary. And they wear special clothes called pajamas. I watched Dean sleep for 6 hours. He seemed annoyed.

Every time they call, it turns into a whole thing and I just sit there nodding. You know what? It’s draining. I stayed for hours listening to the same old drama, and honestly, I would’ve rather been anywhere else. It’s just too much sometimes.

I genuinely HATE oversensitive and overexpressive people