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Let me tell you about my perfect first date. I don't need fancy restaurants, I've eaten at them all. We can go to Denny's, I get the senior discount. I'm verified on all platforms, so you know I'm legit. Plus, I still have all my own teeth.

Let me tell you about my perfect date. First, we'll go early because I need my beauty sleep. I don't need fancy restaurants, I've seen it all. I have more followers than your whole family combined, and I'm still young at heart. That's just facts.

Let me tell you about my perfect first date. I don't need fancy restaurants. We can go to bingo, I'm a champion. I've got my own teeth and I can drive at night. Plus, I'm verified on TikTok. Not many grandmas can say that.

Let me tell you about my morning routine. I wake up at 5 AM because I'm that kind of grandma. I have more energy than your teenage daughter. My coffee is black, like my sense of humor. And yes, I still do my own makeup.

Let me tell you about my morning routine. I wake up at 5 AM because I'm not lazy like these young people. I have 3 million views on my breakfast videos. I'm 95 and still cook better than Gordon Ramsay. That's just facts.

Let me tell you about my perfect day. I wake up at noon because I'm retired and I can. I have more energy than your teenage daughter. My Instagram is popping, and my coffee is strong. I'm living my best life at 95.

Listen, I'm going to tell you about my perfect date. First, we're having early dinner because I go to bed at 7. I'm a cheap date because I have my own money, and yes, I still drive my own car. I'm that good.

Let me tell you about my perfect date. I don't need fancy restaurants. I've eaten at them all since 1940. I want someone who can handle my TikTok fame. And yes, I still have all my own teeth. That's a bonus.