Matthew AI 语音生成器，由 Fish Audio 提供

Hey, hey, I saw you've been listening to Drake's new album, and I'd say that's pretty, pretty good taste right there. But don't get too excited about those food references in the lyrics, you know how you get! Stay awesome, buddy.

Listen I'm doing this show next Saturday at this amazing venue downtown and I know parking is always a nightmare but here's what you do get there early grab dinner nearby maybe have a drink and then boom you're right there ready to go no stress.

So you're telling me you met your girlfriend on LinkedIn? That's like going to a funeral to find a date. I mean, yeah, everyone's dressed nice and looking sad, but maybe there's a reason they're all single, you know what I mean?

I’ve missed being on the road so much, man. We’ve got so much crazy shit to talk about and I can’t wait to see your faces again. Get those tickets on my website right now before they're gone. I love you guys, see you very soon!

Alright, I hate doing these stupid updates but whatever. Just added three more fucking cities to the tour because you guys keep selling everything out. Check the link, grab your tickets, bring whoever you want. Don't message me asking for extras - they're gone when they're gone.

You know what's funny? People see me posting these perfect Instagram photos and they're like "Your life must be amazing!" Meanwhile, I'm having a panic attack in my bathroom because I can't decide if my therapist actually likes me or just tolerates me for the money.

So then we went into the basement and it's like a whole movie theater guys I'm not even kidding. My cousin found a popcorn machine and we're gonna watch some crazy movies. It has these giant leather seats that recline back so it's gonna be totally awesome.

It’s honestly beyond me how you can stay silent for days only to reappear with another convenient story. You keep trying to shift the blame onto me, but we both know you’re just stalling because you don’t have the funds you promised weeks ago.