Speed AI 语音生成器，来自 Fish Audio

Hey, you know what's funny? People always watching TV with their eyes open. Maybe try closing one eye sometimes, it makes different experience. But don't do it while driving car, that's not good luck.

I was sitting in this cafe the other day, just watching people, and I realized I don't recognize half the stuff kids are doing now. It’s like the world just kept spinning and I stayed in the same spot. It makes you feel kind of invisible, you know?

Listen, it’s all about the experience, you know? Sometimes things get a little spicy and it’s just absolutely delightful. I find the whole situation quite adorable, honestly. Don't you think that’s a fun way to describe it? It’s just how we do things, darling.

So I'm standing in line at the gas station yesterday and this person in front of me starts yellin at the cashier cause they ain't got their favorite energy drink. I'm just standin there thinkin like man what is wrong with folks these days getting all worked up over nothing.

After fifteen years, marriage feels less like a music video and more like high-stakes Tetris. You're just trying to fit the chores and kids' schedules together. We used to have that prime Shaq energy, but now we’re just happy if we can finish a movie without someone snoring on the couch.

So we finally sit down at the restaurant, and within five minutes, she starts explaining how her crystals help her navigate the neighborhood. I'm just sitting there, nodding along, thinking this is exactly why I needed to press that pause button on dating in the first place.

You know what's funny? I'm trying to eat my sandwich and my dog's just staring at me like I'm committing a crime for not sharing. And now he's doing this thing where he dramatically sighs every five seconds. Like, really dramatic.

I was in this coffee shop in Brooklyn, and every person was just, you know, buried in their laptops. I asked for a black coffee and the barista looked at me like I'd just asked for a rotary phone. It's like, when did I become the dinosaur, man?