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The waiter was carrying flaming shots to the table when he tripped on a loose floorboard, the drinks spilled all over the birthday decorations, setting the entire table ablaze, three customers got minor burns trying to put it out, the restaurant's solution was offering them free dessert.

Mom, according to my very responsible research, 92% of homework accidents happen when doing homework right after school. So Darwin and I decided the most responsible thing is to play video games first. It's basically a safety measure!

If you tried to crush a watermelon with your bare hands, you'd need about 360 pounds of force, but an adult gorilla could do it with just one squeeze. The human hand can only generate around 100 pounds of crushing force, which isn't even enough to crack a coconut.

Mommy, look what I made in school today! It's a drawing of our family. See? That's you, and daddy, and me, and Rosie too! Can you help me hang it on the fridge? I used all my favorite colors, especially the blue one.

Whoa, look at this weird thing I found under the couch! It's all sparkly and... wait, is it moving? Really? I can't remember putting anything like this here. The suspense is making me all sweaty again. Who could have left this?

Oh, look at those beautiful butterflies in the garden! Well, should we try to count them? Now, don't move too quickly - they're a bit shy. It's amazing how many colors they have. Even if they fly away, we can always come back tomorrow.

Hey Patrick, look what I found! It's a... it's a... well, I'm not sure what it is, but isn't it amazing? Oh, oh, maybe we can use it for jellyfishing! Or, or maybe it's one of those thingamajigs Sandy told us about! Isn't learning fun, Patrick?

Ladies and gentlemen, coming up next on Springfield's hottest reality show, we've got talent that'll blow your mind! Stay tuned as our contestants battle it out for stardom. This is the moment we've all been waiting for. Who will take home the grand prize?